Tag: the elder scrolls

On His Mane’s Secret Service – Chapter 5

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Chapter 5

The next morning, as planned, Ra’Jirra left with Dar’Amon to the Palace, but had to leave him at the gate while she returned to Princess Sauki’s suite to prepare for her Presentation and meeting with the Mane. Dar’Amon assured her that he would be waiting for her, no matter how long it took.

This time the tailors had a custom-fitted Raba ready for her, but she took it into a private room where she dressed alone before stepping out again.

“So, how does it fit?” the Princess began, turning to Ra’Jirra as she emerged from the dressing room.

“The fit is excellent, as expected. Your tailors have done a perfect job,” she said, smiling as the jaws dropped around her.

“No!” the Princess said. “You can’t wear that! Take it off! Immediately!”

“Sorry Princess,” Ra’Jirra said, setting her face firmly. “This is how I will be presented to the Mane.”

One of the female tailors started stammering, but Ra’Jirra gave her a look that would brook no argument from the likes of her.

However, the Princess’ face turned softer. “I see.  Do you know what you’re doing, Ra’Jirra? This alone could get you expelled or worse.”

“If so,” Ra’Jirra replied, losing her hostile tone, “I will own it. This is how I choose to wear the Raba.”

“I applaud your spirit, if foolish. Then come, if you’re ready?”

“I’m ready,” Ra’Jirra said, and the two walked together towards the main entrance of the Palace.

Once inside, Ra’Jirra tried not to marvel at the grandeur of the place, but knew she wasn’t doing a good job. Everywhere her eyes lit there was something new, from artwork the likes of which she had never seen before, to statues of khajiits great and small. She wanted to stop and look at them further, and to discover who these were, but time did not allow.

Instead she followed the Princess through the great hall and to the foyer of the throne room.

“We wait here,” the Princess said, “Until our names are called. I will go first. Watch me and my Presentation and do your best to mimic it. If by chance he doesn’t immediately order the guards to take you from his presence, perhaps a good rendition of the proper Presentation will make up for… that.”

“Thank you, Princess Sauki. I will do my best. It’s all I can do.”

She began to get nervous and second guess what she’d done. But it was too late now, she knew. Instead she drew in a deep breath and exhaled. Whatever happened, would happen.

A herald called a name. “The Princess Sauki!” he shouted, and the Princess walked in through the huge doorway. Beyond she heard many khajiit voices call the short barking noise that served as their form of polite applause at the Princess’ entrance.  For a split second Ra’Jirra feared she would have to wait alone, missing the Presentation, but the herald continued, “And The Agent Ra’Jirra!”

She walked into the throne room with her head held high, trying not to show fear as best she could.  The Mane’s audience, standing to both sides of the great hall, began to give her the same greeting as the Princess, but one by one the applause died away and was replaced by an intake of breath as they realized what Ra’Jirra was wearing underneath the Raba.

Impossibly far away, she saw the Mane – a great figure of a Cathay-Raht draped across his throne. That he was without clothing himself was no surprise. The saying went that no clothing was more Regal than his own fur, and only on rare occasions was he ever seen dressed, and then typically only in a robe fit for the ruler of a mighty nation. Even from this distance, though, Ra’Jirra couldn’t help but be impressed. He was magnificent in every way.

The Princess began the long walk to the Throne and Ra’Jirra walked a few paces behind, stepping in time to the walk of the Princess, and trying to match not only her stride, but her tail movements as well. The audience had gone quiet, and she wasn’t sure if it was due to her insolence, or if this was normal.

With every step, though, the Mane seemed to grow taller and Ra’Jirra lost her focus more than once. She did keep her head high, however – but without actually looking the Mane in the eyes. It wasn’t hard, other parts kept attracting her eyes anyway.

After what felt like an interminable walk, the Princess finally arrived at the foot of the throne and Ra’Jirra stopped as well, bowing her head in time with the Princess. She wasn’t sure, but she felt like she was doing well.

The Princess turned around, gave her a quick look, and then prostrated herself on the ground, her tail straight as an arrow towards the roof, the Raba falling away as designed.

“Greetings Princess Sauki,” said an elder, grey-furred khajiit beside the Mane.

The Mane’s deep voice then filled the hallway, “Rise. You are recognized.”

The Princess responded as she stood and turned back towards him, “To the Mane’s Honor!”, then she walked to the side to join the other members of the audience.

Then all eyes were on Ra’Jirra and she fought against the impulse to cringe. Worse than all those eyes on her were the deep blue eyes of the Mane that she had glanced at only for a split second earlier. They were now on her. For a moment she forgot what she was to do, but with a nearly imperceptible shake of her head, she focused on what was right in front of her. This Mane may be a Cathay-Raht of great size, especially when compared to her… he may hold the reigns of power over an entire nation and people… but his private parts were no different than any other. He was, all in all, still just a male khajiit – not a god, as ideal as his body may be.

All this passed through her head in a split second, then she remembered her training. She stepped forward, turned around smartly, then went to her hands and knees, her tail pointing directly at the ceiling. She felt the cloth of the Raba fall away to either side, and she smiled, imagining the view the Mane was getting now.

“Might as well enjoy it while you can,” she said to herself. The moment seemed to go on forever, but she had practically began to laugh when she heard the old man.

“Greetings Agent Ra’Jirra!”

She held her position, waiting to hear what words would come from the Mane – words that would decide the future of her life.

“Rise,” came the deep voice. “You are recognized.”

She stood up, knowing she was visibly shaking now and turned back to the Mane. She risked the briefest of looks at his face. The smile on it was unmistakable. She repeated the proscribed words.

“To the Mane’s Honor!” she said, though she felt like she was just squeaking.

She could swear she heard the Mane snort, holding back laughter of his own. Though probably no one but the Mane could have seen it, she was now glad she’d not only worn the underwear colored to match her own fur, but also added the pink heart at the most private area. She had sincerely hoped he had a sense of humor!

Then she stood to the side, beside the Princess. Talking among the audience was forbidden save for applause for the other guests, and her duty was to stand as still as she could while others were introduced. Em entered sometime later, and prostrated himself before the Mane as well, but when he joined the audience he stood beside her. She looked up at him.

“Damn!” he mouthed.

She smiled back and shrugged.

Then finally the official Presentations were over, and the audience retired to a large waiting room where they could relax while the Mane and his retinue went to his private meeting rooms.

“So?” she finally was able to ask the Princess. “How’d I do?”

“Well, other than the Underwear Fiasco, I’d say you did better than expected. And somehow you’re still here, so that’s a relief!”

“I assume that means if I was going to be beheaded, I wouldn’t be here now?”

“No, Ra;Jirra, you’ve passed the test. Though I think he liked you, or you might not be here no.! Wearing underwear under a Raba! Unheard of!”

“Well, it’s been heard of now!” Ra’Jirra laughed.

On His Mane’s Secret Service – Chapter 1

Somehow it looks like I forgot to post the first chapter here! Or Tumblr took it down. Probably the former.

On His Mane’s Secret Service
Chapter 1

She stood flanked by two quite sturdy Altmer as they stood upon the open platform that began to rise on the power of Altmer magic. The wind stirred her hair as she looked up at the impossibly tall building.

Magic. Only the Altmer retained enough magic to construct this building. Though it’s foundations were as solid as any other building, she could not imagine how it had ever been erected without the slowly-dwindling resource that now few but the Mer could summon. She lost count of the number of floors she had risen when the platform finally slowed. She felt a momentary panic as her weight suddenly dropped and an unreasonable feeling that the wind might sweep her off the platform to the ground below overcame her.

When it stopped, one of the guards opened the door and she followed him in, the other guard right behind her. After the door was closed behind her, she involuntarily fell to her knees. She was going to be sick and nothing she could do would stop it. A hand came into view – one of the guards held a bag and she retched into it unceremoniously.

“Sorry,” she said after she’d voided her stomach, and the guard produced a cup of water and a towel for her. So much for dignity. She took his hand after she’d cleaned herself up, sheathing her claws that had extended involuntarily as the other guard disposed of the bag,. The guards had been through this before obviously.

She stood and looked back at the glass door. The platform was gone and she realized that she was completely helpless here in the stronghold of her enemy. She could not possibly get back down without their help.

“Ra’Jirra,” said a smooth voice in Ta’agra. She saw it came from a thin Altmer who had appeared without a sound.

“Please come in. Sorry about the nausea. It is natural, there’s no need for shame. You get used to it eventually. How was your trip?”

“Thank you,” Ra’Jirra said, following him into a large office, where she took the seat he offered her. “The trip was uneventful, though I think the blindfold was a bit much. It’s not like this building is hard to spot.”

“Ah. Old traditions die hard. You are our enemy, after all.”

Ra’Jirra looked at the Mer, her eyes narrowing. “I am.”

“That is unfortunate. And unwise. But facts are facts. Still, you must be aware that if we wanted to kill you, the opportunities have been… legion. I am a little surprised that our request for you personally to attend was honored, frankly.”

Ra’Jirra was impressed. This Altmer’s Ta’agra was flawless.

“To whom do I address?” she asked, though the question was moot. Still, even among enemies, the protocols must be obeyed.

“I am #1 of the Aldmeri Dominion. That is the appellation I prefer you use. But you surprise me, Ra’Jirra. I did not expect you would have diplomatic tact. Have you been trained in diplomacy too?”

“I’ve picked up some of the niceties,” she replied. “Shall we get down to business?”

“With pleasure,” he said. “Before his untimely demise, I believe you met with a mutual acquaintance – #4, did you not?”

“I did. I didn’t expect a fortune-teller though.”

“Ah. So he showed you the future, did he?”

“He showed me something.”

“And have you informed your superiors of that?”

“I did not. Pictures on a wall. What of them? They could be anything. Anything at all. No one knows the future. Not even you Aldmeri with all of your magic.”

#1 nodded, folding his hands as if in prayer in front of her. “Indeed, we cannot. The future isn’t written. But what we can do isn’t far from it. Tell me, do you have weather forecasters in Torval?”

“Of course, though I wouldn’t call them forecasters. They take the weather reports from Hammerfell and predict how long the same weather will take to arrive in Elsweyr. It’s not hard.”

“And are they accurate?”

“Usually. Not always.”

“Yes. They too cannot predict the future accurately. But they can be right more than they are wrong. That is what we can do. We can predict many things. There is a storm coming, Ra’Jirra. A storm that, if not thwarted, will destroy the Mer, the Khajiiti, and even the Argonians with their precious Hist. That storm exists, and it is coming, Ra’Jirra. To reach the outcome you were shown will take thousands of years, it is true. But it is a big storm. We play the long game here, you see. Yet single-handedly your efforts against us have cost us much.”

Ra’Jirra smiled and sat back in her chair.

“Are you proud of that, khajiit? Are you PROUD that you have prevented our every attempt to preserve your own race as well our own?”

“I am proud that I have accomplished my various missions. I don’t see your acts in Tamriel as benefiting anyone but yourselves frankly. You continuously have striven to cause division between Hammerfell and Cyrodiil. What I have done, as I see it, is to prevent war between the humans on a massive scale, saving untold thousands of lives.”

“Undoubtedly you have done so, but if you saw it as we do, you would realize that those thousands of lives you saved will someday cost tens of thousands of lives. MILLIONS! OF KHAJIIT LIVES!”

The Altmer stood from behind his desk, his outburst causing visible flushing of his face.

“So you say,” Ra’Jirra said calmly.

#1 shook himself. He looked at her, then sat back down.

“I have lost my composure. That is inexcusable, but please do believe me when I tell you I regret that. That is not our way. It was the downfall of my predecessor, and I do learn from others’ mistakes. I will not repeat it again.”

“Thank you, Number One,” Ra’Jirra said sincerely. “I am aware that my life is in your hands. I do hope those hands are steady.”

“You came to Alinor willingly. You followed all our requirements. I would not disrespect that trust. But we have reached an impasse, you and I. It boils down to belief. I believe in our prediction, Ra’Jirra. I believe in it with all my heart. You do not. Of course, you cannot comprehend the magics involved in our discovery of it. You and your kind simply don’t have the resources any longer to comprehend magic the way we do. I do not blame you for that. Even some of our fellow Mer can’t grasp it. But at the very least, trust me when i tell you that I do not just believe in this prediction. I cannot believe anything else. It is simply the truth of the future. There will be no Khajiiti, no Mer, no Argonians. Only Humans. They will take over the entirety of Mundus if something isn’t done to stop them – and soon. With every passing day that ‘something’ must be larger. Their dominance is not yet assured, but its probability increases with every day. Your own actions have increased it even more.”

“I am a servant of the Mane,” Ra’Jirra said quietly.

“Indeed, and a good and loyal servant. Which leads me to why I’ve asked you here today.”

Ra’Jirra looked up as he stood, and she stood likewise. A declaration was imminent.

“Ra’Jirra, I propose an unprecedented meeting to you today. A meeting between the doomed races of Tamriel. I would like to meet personally with the Mane, and another whom you do not know of.”

“A meeting? Directly with the Mane? Impossible.” Ra’Jirra said, her eyes widening.

“It is possible. It must be possible. Only by explaining our circumstances directly will he and one other be convinced. Perhaps our methods were ill-advised, but our goal must become his goal, or we are truly doomed. The Magic cannot last. We cannot hold against them alone.”

“Who is this Other?”

“It is a secret the Argonians have held for millennia. But we know better. The Argonians are not strictly a Collective as you and everyone else has been told. No, Ra’Jirra. They are secretly a Matriarchy. She is known to them, for want of a better term, as the Histess. She is their leader from behind the scenes. But we know of her. Even now we have sent a diplomat to request her presence at this historic meeting of the Mer, the Khajiiti and the Argonians.”

#1 paused for effect, before continuing, “Once, your kind were allied to us. Remind your Mane of that. We request this audience with him at his own pleasure, but in the spirit of the alliance that once stood between us, he should accept. He may determine the place and time.”

Ra’Jirra stood dumbfounded, before she found her voice. “You will represent the Mer? All of the Mer?”

#1 nodded. “I have the authority. I do. I will bring a contingent of each, if that is acceptable to your Mane, as proof of my authority in this.”

Ra’Jirra thought about it. The Mane did not grant diplomatic audience with anyone. But… it was true that the Altmer were once allies of the Khajiit. Slavers as well at other times, but…

She took a deep breath. “I question if bringing me here was wise. I am an agent, not a diplomat. I’m not even sure if I can get an audience with the Mane myself!”

“You are a known enemy of the Altmer…” #1 started.

“Not of the Altmer. Of the Dominion,” she pointed out.

“I am corrected. Of the Dominion. There is no one better to present my request to the Mane. And I think you can manage it. Ra’Jirra, our attempts to thwart the human storm have failed using our own subterfuge and tactics. It is time for a different approach.”

“I hope he doesn’t accept,” Ra’Jirra said honestly.

“That,” #1 smiled, “Is not your decision.”

“I will take your proposal back to Elsweyr. That is all I can promise.”

“And tell them what you have seen,” #1 added.

“I will tell them what you have showed me. With all the skepticism I feel.”

“That will suffice. It has to.”

On His Mane’s Secret Service – Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Em was not available when Dar’Amon and Ra’Jirra arrived at the HMSS headquarters, so she left her report with his secretary, Miss Ponsonby. Ra’Jirra and Miss Ponsonby had never been friends, but she had helped her after the Argonian affair, and she had gained a grudging respect for the surly old khajiit afterwards.

“You two just go back to your room. I’ll leave your report with Em and will have someone contact you and bring you back in when he returns.”

The two did as requested and spent the afternoon strolling the streets of Torval. The city had become quite crowded in recent years, with an influx of young khajiits relocating from the hard life of rural farmers and tradesmen to try and make a name for themselves in the Big City. Many of the impediments to living there had been improved as it had lost the putrid smell and congestion with advances in plumbing and sanitation. Even the crime rate had decreased significantly.

The two sat on a park bench, watching the pedestrians stroll by. Dar’Amon sat on Ra’Jirra’s shoulder, whispering in her sensitive ear so that his ability to speak wasn’t discovered.

“You know, this park didn’t even exist a few years ago. The Mane is really doing a good job making this city better,” he said.

“Oh, I know. It’s almost unrecognizable from the place I first visited ten years ago! I heard there’s talk of deepening the docks so bigger ships can port here.”

“All this change… I know it’s for the best, but sometimes…”

Ra’Jirra stroked the cat’s head beside her. “It’s too much. Too soon. We barely have enough time to figure out the new ways before something even newer comes along.”

“Well, what can you do? Just make do as best we can I suppose. Some things are starting to seem downright barbaric though.”

They watched as one of the Mane’s concubines passed by with her retinue, dressed in the her gauzy and transparent costume.

“Like that?” Ra’Jirra said when they’d passed by.

“Exactly like that. Look, even in my Alfiq state, I’m as… male as the next guy. But really…”

“You’re getting conservative in your old age, Dar.”

“Hmph. Probably.  Have you ever met the Mane?”

“Me?! No. I know Em meets with him regularly, and I heard Queue had an interview with him during that Argonian thing. But no, I’ve never even been inside the Palace. I’ve seen him on the balcony during speeches of course.”

“I went inside once,” Dar’Amon confided. “Not officially. I just wanted to look around. Easy thing to do when you’re a cat.”

“Jeeze Dar! That’s an easy way to get yourself killed! It’s not like the guards don’t know an Alfiq from a real cat!”

Dar’Amon started licking a paw. “Ah… It was shortly after they’d shut down the research that made me… this. I was pretty depressed back then, knowing that I’d be stuck this way for the rest of my life.  I don’t think I was exactly suicidal, just… I didn’t care much about life anymore.”

“Dar, you never told me that.”

“I know. I didn’t want you to think I was crazy in the head too. But yeah. It was a hard time for me. But I got over it eventually. You kind of have to. What else can you do?”

“Well, I’m glad you got over it.”

“Working for the HMSS helped a lot. And Em personally. He helped me see that, even in this state, I can still do a lot of good for Elsweyr.”

“So what was it like, in the Palace?”

“Oh, pretty much what you’d expect. All marble floors and gold leaf. I never saw the Mane, but I can tell you their kitchens have the most excellent fish!”

“I bet!”

Dar nudged her ear then. “Raj. I think that’s the HMSS courier! See him?”

Ra’Jirra stood up, letting Dar’Amon leap off her shoulder to the bench. The courier literally ran to them.

“You are Ra’Jirra?”

“I am. You’re from the HMSS?”

“Yes. You’re wanted at the headquarters. Immediately. And I am to stress… immediately.”

Ra’Jirra looked at Dar’Amon, then back to the courier. “Oh…kay. What’s the emergency?”

“Just a Courier, Ma’am. I’ve got a wagon to take you there.”

Ra’Jirra picked up Dar’ Amon and followed the Courier back. He probably knew about the Alfiq, but protocol said he was not to be treated like anything but a normal cat when in public.  The wagon was driven by another man, obviously experienced in navigating traffic. They arrived back at headquarters in record time.

——————

“What do you mean, you didn’t think it was important?!”

Em was angry. Angrier than Raj had ever seen him before, and she felt even worse because it was directed at her. Worse yet, he was right to be.

“Look, Em, it was just magic pictures on a wall! The Altmer can conjure up anything. You know that. Just propaganda to get me to side with them.”

“Damn it Raj, you have to know it was important! You’ve been trained to report the littlest of things, yet you didn’t report this?!”

“I’m sorry Em.”

“Raj, I know you. I know you hate the Altmer. I think you didn’t want to share anything that could show them in a positive way. That’s it, isn’t it?”

“Not the Altmer,” she said, dejected. “The Dominion. They killed my friends. They killed Sarosh. They killed Ropes. Yes Em. You’re right. I should have reported it. I’m sorry, but I have come to hate them. They’re devious, cunning and dangerous. Believing anything they say is stupid!”

“Ra’Jirra, that’s not your call to make. But I see now you’ve lost your detachment. Do you understand what that means? Ra’Jirra, I can no longer trust you.”

She looked up at her mentor’s face. The anger was still there, but it was rapidly being overcome with a pitying look that made her eyes tear up.

“No! Em…”

“Ra’Jirra. I’m sorry too. But I can’t have you in the Service any longer. You’re fired.”

“Em! I can change! I can be dispassionate again!”

“No Ra’Jirra. You can’t. How long have we known each other? You’ve been one of my best agents. You’re not leaving with any dishonor. You are and will always be a friend to me as well, and I hope I will continue to be yours. But you are biased. For damned good reason, but the fact remains. You must leave the service. Now.”

Rajirra continued to look at him. She had always looked up to the big Cathay-Raht, though that was obvious. But she knew he was a father-figure to her as well. And now he was telling her to leave the family. It hurt. She felt the tears roll down her face, making tracks like a cheetah.

Em stepped close and put his arms around her. “I’m sorry, Raj. Really I am.”

She accepted his embrace and returned it. “Me too Em.”

“M’enji” he said, and she looked up uncomprehending through blurred eyes.

“My real name.”

“M’enji” she said, as if tasting the name. “You honor me.”

“I do. I have many contacts in the government, Raj. If you’re interested, I can find you a good placement.”

“I’m… really off the Service?”

“Yes Raj.”

She wiped the tears away, though they returned quickly. She looked away from him. “I’ll think about it, Em. I need some time to think.”

Then she laughed, incongruously. “I was going to tell you. Dar and I… we got engaged.”

“About time,” her former boss said. “Congratulations.”

“He’ll be happy to hear the news.”

“No he won’t, Raj. If he’s the man I think he is, he wants you to be happy. And you’re not happy. He won’t be celebrating anything today. But he may help you to understand. I am happy for you two, for what it’s worth.”

“Thank you Em,” she said, walking to the door. He followed her and stopped close behind when she didn’t open it. She looked around the room, realizing it was probably the last time she would stand within it.

“I’ll miss this place,” she said honestly, but her voice was returning to normal.

Em said nothing but put his oversized hand on her shoulder. She touched it briefly, then opened the door to the outer office.

“Miss Ponsonby,” he said with an official tone. “Please escort Ra’Jirra from the premises as soon as she’s gathered her belongings.”

The secretary’s eyes grew large, and Em nodded in assurance that she’d understood correctly.

Ra’Jirra left the office of the head of the HMSS, never to return.

On His Mane’s Secret Service – Chapter 2

On His Mane’s Secret Service
Chapter 2

Ra’Jirra walked the gangway back to her waiting Elsweyr ship. She saw Dar’Amon waiting at the other end and smiled at him. A proper greeting had to wait until they got back to the privacy of their room, however.

“So,” Dar’Amon said from her shoulder as she closed the door behind them. “What? What happened? You’re lucky to still be alive, you foolish kitten!”

“Now Dar, it’s my job. Besides, if they’d just killed me outright that would look awfully bad if they’ve any hopes of any diplomatic future at all.”

“I know… but…”

“Aww. You were worried about me?” Ra’Jirra said, putting her gear on the floor.

“Well,” the cat stammered, “Of course I was!”

She picked him up and put her on her lap as she pulled out her writing instruments and began to encode a message to her boss, Em. Dar’Amon didn’t try to read it. Each agent of the HMSS had a different encoding method, and even between two as close as Ra’Jirra and Dar’Amon had become, they would never share that. She began to write. Even though she would get to Elsweyr along with the message, it was standard practice to write of any encounters like the one she’d just had as soon as possible.
“Sorry Dar, but I think this is probably one of those Need To Know cases,” she said, stroking the cat.

The cat sighed, and jumped up on the writing desk.

“Raj, can we talk for a little bit?”

Ra’Jirra looked at Dar’Amon. He had his serious face on. Even with the Alfiq body, she’d come to be able to read the face well.

“Just give me a couple of minutes. This won’t take long.”

The cat sighed and lay down on the table in front of her. Though in an Alfiq body for most of the time they had known each other, the moons had aligned twice since they’d met when he’d reverted to his native Cathay form for a few short days.

“Raj, where do you think we’re heading?” he said as she continued writing.

“To Elsweyr of course, silly,” she laughed without interrupting her work.

“No. Not geographically. Romantically. You and me and our relationship, I mean.”

She looked up from her paper. Dar’Amon was licking a paw nonchalantly. “I don’t know, Dar. I like you, you must know that. Why?”

“And I, you. A lot. But this… thing I’ve done to myself. This body and the lycanthropy… it’s not going to go away you know.”

“Gatanthropy,” she corrected. “And I know. But it’s alright. It’s not a big deal to me, Dar. You return to your normal state often enough for me.”

The Alfiq head turned to look at her.  “Truly?”

“Yes, Dar. I’m not that needy, despite what you may think on based on those days!”

Dar’Amon lay his head back down and she went back to writing. A few minutes later, she had finished and sealed the paper before picking up her lover and setting him on her shoulder.

She set him on the bed before getting in herself. “Now what’s this all about?”

“Rajirra,” he began, and she sat up. He didn’t often use her full name these days, so it probably meant it was important.

“I’ve been thinking about us a lot lately. If you really are being honest with me, that this Alfiq thing doesn’t bother you…”

“Dar, you’ve got to know by now it doesn’t. If you must know I’ve been asking Em if you can come with me on my assignments. If I didn’t want you with me, I sure wouldn’t have done that.”

Dar’Amon stood up and climbed onto her lap. “Really? You’ve been asking Em for me?”

Ra’Jirra rubbed his neck. “Yes Dar. I didn’t want to tell you though. But… I like being with you. A lot.”

“Aw! Raj! You should have told me! I just thought he kept pawning me off on you to keep me out of their way.”

“No, silly cat.”

“I’m due for another moon phase next week you know…”

“Are you kidding? I’ve marked it in my schedule! Dar, you know I don’t just toss around the ‘L’ word. But I think I might be in love with you. Really.”

The cat walked up her chest and nuzzled her face. “Ra’Jirra, that’s so good to hear. Do me a favor would you? In my bag under the bed, there’s a black box.  Would you do me a favor and bring it up here?”

“Sure. Hold on…” Ra’Jirra said, picking up the cat and setting i him beside her. She got down on the floor and pulled the bag out and rummaged around to find the box.

“Here you go,” she said, setting it beside Dar’Amon with a mischievous smile.

“RAJ! Don’t be mean. Open it for me!”

She laughed and did as he asked. But then she saw what was in it and her laughter died immediately.

“Is this…” she started, drawing out the jewelry.

“That,” Dar’Amon said, as seriously as a small cat’s voice could be made to sound, “is an Amulet of Mara.”

Ra’Jirra looked at the Alfiq in front of her, her eyes wide. A thousand thoughts crowded into her mind, all vying for primacy. This was not how she imagined this moment would come!

“Dar!” she said.

“You don’t have to answer right away. I honestly didn’t expect to open it at all. But, you said…”

“You plan ahead, don’t you?”

“Well, when you’ve only got hands a few days a month, you kinda learn to!”

“Come here you cute thing!” Ra’Jirra said, lifting him bodily and planting an impressive kiss on his feline face.

“Of course I do.”

“You do what?!”

“I’ll marry you, Dar’Amon!”

“Well, that’s a relief! I hope you don’t regret it. Put it on! I want to see you wearing my Amulet.”

“Hold on… I’ll be right back,” Ra’Jirra said, taking the amulet and retreating to the changing room. She emerged a minute later.

“What do you think? Does it look good on me?” she asked, displaying herself in front of her fiance.

“It looks… beautiful, Raj. But it appears to be magical. Apparently it makes your clothes disappear!” he laughed and she joined him on the bed.

“Sorry we can’t celebrate properly,” he said, curling up atop her chest.

“We have all the time in the world, Dar. We’re together, and that’s all the celebration I need.”

Some time later, they awoke. The sun had set through the small porthole, and Ra’Jirra got up to dress.

“Let’s go for a walk,” she said from the other room, tucking the amulet into her blouse out of sight.

“Sounds like a fine idea, my bride!”

“Why now?” she asked, pulling the curtain to the dressing room closed behind her.

“Ra’Jirra, I have to be honest with you. I worried about you taking this mission. We all know the Dominion would prefer you out of the way. I think Em made a mistake, allowing you to go. You’re not a diplomat! But if you’re going to get yourself killed, I figured I’d better ask before that!”

“Dar, you know our job is inherently dangerous. It comes with the paycheck. But it was a good plan. If you think being married to an Alfiq is physically problematic, being married to a ghost is practically impossible!”

“Do you ever think about retiring?” he asked her, and she stopped, turning back.

“Why? You want me to settle down and raise kittens? Making demands awfully early for having just won yourself a lifemate.”

“I’m sorry. But I do worry. No one notices a cat, but you’re practically a celebrity. Someday your luck is going to run out, I’m afraid.”

“I’ve thought about it. But Dar, I like what I do. I feel like I’m making a difference in the world, you know?”

“I know. Me too I suppose. I just… don’t want to be married to a ghost.”

“Funny thing that. I don’t particularly want to become one!” she said, opening the door. “Coming?”

“Would you haunt me?” Dar’Amon asked, jumping down the bed and following her to the door for a stroll outside.

“Till your dying day, cat. Now shut up. You’re not supposed to be able to talk, remember?”

“Oh… yeah. I mean… meow.”


https://bdfanfic.tumblr.com/post/180229569128/audio_player_iframe/bdfanfic/tumblr_pidktnk3Cm1wbv2m8?audio_file=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.tumblr.com%2Faudio_file%2Fbdfanfic%2F180229569128%2Ftumblr_pidktnk3Cm1wbv2m8

Chapter 1 of 18 of my 2nd Spyjirra fiction named You Only Live 18 Times. It’s set in an alternate future of the Elder Scrolls universe – a bit of a steampunk-ish setting. Cut me a bit of slack though, I’m far from a professional reader and certainly not a voice actor. But I did add some effects that make it a bit more interesting I think.The character of Ra’Jirra is based on Kazerad’s side character, though even I have to admit, the connection is tenuous at best.

You Only Live 18 Times #18

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In fact, it took Ra’Jirra three days to get back to Torval after she’d left the Hammerfell ship. The one thing she’d neglected to pack in the CAT was a stash of gold, and she couldn’t very well sell the gun. Once she’d gotten to shore, she couldn’t figure out what to do with the CAT itself, so she ended up dragging it into some weeds and just hoping no one found it till she could get some HMSS agents back to retrieve it. From there, it was a long hike with occasional stops on the way. She’d rediscovered her old talent as a dancer in the occasional bars along the way. Happily her talent was still in enough demand to keep her fed and a roof over her head. But the costumes she managed to get the regular girls to loan her were even skimpier than they had been in her day.  She was rather proud that she still fit into them well, however.

When finally she made it back to the HMSS headquarters, she looked a sight and probably smelled about the same. Fortunately she knew all the correct codes and passwords so getting through security wasn’t a problem, but she loathed what Em’s secretary would have to say.

“Ra’Jirra?!” is what she actually said first.

“Hello. Yes, I know what I look like. It’s been a hard few days, and I’m broke.”

“Goodness, come with me. You’re not going in to see Em dressed like that! Have you even taken a bath?”

“I had one two days ago,” she confessed as she followed Em’s secretary out of the office to the gym in the building, where she insisted on Ra’Jirra take a shower – though Ra’Jirra secretly longed to get clean anyway. The secretary then gave her a workout outfit she kept in her own locker. After she’d put that on, Ra’Jirra was taken outdoors to a nearby clothes store.

There, the secretary bought her an outfit she’d never have dreamed of buying for herself – frankly it looked like an old woman’s outfit. The skirt was bad enough, covered all the way down to her feet with not so much as even the slightest slit on the side. The collar was so high that not a bit of fur could be seen at the chest, and even the sleeves were long and conservative. She came out of the dressing room feeling like an old maid.

“I suppose this is your idea of a joke,” Ra’Jirra said to the secretary. “Sure. Kick her while she’s down.”

“I beg your pardon! Ra’Jirra, you have no gratitude at all. Now look at yourself in this mirror.”

Ra’Jirra did as she was bid. She looked in the mirror. The khajiit that looked back at her was stunning. The outfit was every bit as conservative as she had imagined it, but it’s blandness just accentuated her best features, especially her hair.  Even the high-necked shirt, covered with the laced-up vest looked unexpectedly sexy despite revealing nothing underneath. It was as if a light went off in her fashion-senses. By covering herself even more, she brought more attention to what lay hidden. The drab colors made her fur color stand out as well.

She looked back at the secretary, stunned.

“I… I don’t know what to say! It’s beautiful!”

“Of course it is, you idiot. Enough wasting time. Em will be wondering where I’ve gone. Why I risk my job for you, I really don’t know.”

The secretary stopped and paid for the outfit, then hustled her back to the HMSS headquarters.

“Miss… Ponsonby, right?”

The secretary stopped and looked at her, anger on her face.

“You’ve been here how many years? Yes, Ra’Jirra. My name is Loelia Ponsonby. Yes, I was raised by humans. No, it doesn’t have any secret meaning.”

“Miss Ponsonby, I’m sorry. I’ve severely misjudged you. I thought you hated me.”

“Ra’Jirra, if you haven’t figured it out by now, I hate everybody. Now get your ass in to see Em.”

“Well, thank you anyway.”

“About time I get some thanks. Now go on.”

Ra’Jirra stepped into Em’s office. He was writing a letter when he looked up.

“Ra’Jirra? Oh my god! Took you long enough! I thought we’d lost you to a Hammerfell prison, based on what Dar-Amon and Geeus told us!”

“No. I escaped. I just had a hard time getting back.”

Queue walked in then and nodded to Ra’Jirra.

“Welcome back Ra’Jirra. Where’s my CAT?”

“Long story Queue. Right now, if no one has found it, it’s in some weeds near the beach a few miles south of Senchal. I’ll draw you a map when I’m done talking with Em and you can send someone down to retrieve it.”

“Ah, yes. Okay. Em, I just wanted to let you know. We’ve just finished the last quality check on the new engine. It passes with flying colors. We’ll be fitting it to our first powered ship next week.”

“Excellent,” Em said. “Keep me updated.”

Queue left and Em turned back to Ra’Jirra.

“Where’s Wears-Only-Ropes? Does Hammerfell still have her?”

“I assume Dar-Amon has filled you in on the altmer underwater ship by now?”

“Oh, yes, yes. We’ve got tons of argonian witnesses, Geeus among them. War’s cancelled. In fact, your dark friend has sent us another secret overture for talks with normalizing relations with Hammerfell. It appears they know you and Wears-Only-Ropes saved their ship.”

“Yeah, they do. The Captain let me go actually, Em. With the CAT.”

“Really? That’s… unexpectedly decent of him.”

“But Wears-Only-Ropes was lost. She used one of the mines from the CAT to destroy the altmer ship but… It was a big explosion.”

“Hmm. I’ll send a message to Cyrodiil. Not sure if she has family there or not though.”

“Let me know if so. I’d really like to visit them sometime. She was truly a hero, you know.”

“I see. Well, welcome back. You can stay in the usual apartment. We keep it rented for visiting agents. Cheaper than a hotel, you know.”

“I know em.  But thanks.  Except… Em, I’m broke. Could I maybe borrow a bit from petty cash till I can get to my bank?”

“Oh, of course. Ask the secretary on the way out. Now go on. Take a few days off. Nothing pressing right now. But I do want a full written report in 2 days time.”

“Got it,” Ra’Jirra said, adding, “It’s Miss Ponsonby by the way.”

“Eh? What’s that?”

“Your secretary. Her name is Miss Ponsonby.”

Em looked up from some papers on his desk. “Of course it is, Ra’Jirra. What, you think I don’t know my own secretary’s name?”

“No, not really. But maybe you should call her that. Instead of ‘the secretary’”

He shrugged.  “Okay, if it makes you feel better. See Miss Ponsonby on the way out.”

She did so and was granted plenty of spending cash, then went to the old apartment she often stayed at.

“Hello?” called a voice from the bathroom when she opened the door. It was a voice she instantly recognized.

“Dar-Amon?!  I didn’t know you were here!” she squealed and ran into the bathroom.

“Ra’Jirra?!” said Dar-Amon. “Wait!”

“Whoa! Sorry Mister. I didn’t mean to interrupt your bath. I thought you were someone else,” she said at the naked Cathay standing in the bathtub.

“Ra’Jirra,” he repeated and she suddenly figured it out.

“DAR?!”

“Yeah, Ra’Jirra. It’s me. Sorry. Moon phases. I’m Cathay for two days.”

“Dar, you’re a hunk!”

“Really? You think so?”

“I do! Two days huh?”

“Yup,” he said, stepping out of the bath and towards her. “That’s an… interesting outfit Raj. Not your normal style though, is it?”

Ra’Jirra smiled and put her hands on his broad shoulders. “No. It’s not. Maybe it should be?”

Dar-Amon shook his head, “Maybe, but not right now…”

He began to unlace her vest slowly, not taking his eyes off her face.

Ra’Jirra pulled his hands away, and Dar-Amon’s smile faltered.

“No silly,” Ra’Jirra said, and zipped the whole lace off in an instant. “Too slow!”

And then she pounced.

You Only Live 18 Times #17

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Ra’Jirra sat atop the CATv3, motionless in the fog that surrounded her after the explosion. It still had a little power, but there was no sense in using it when she had no idea which direction was which. Instead, she waited for the fog to clear. Before too long she was able to see blue sky above her as the fog thinned, and not long after it blew away completely.  

Somewhere behind her the Dominion lay at the bottom of the ocean, and with it, her friend’s remains too. Probably not far from where her crew members bodies lay. She tried not to think about that too much. Ropes had known it was a one-way mission. Still…

She saw the Hammerfell ship to one side. She was very happy to see it was still under sail, even happier to see it was turning back towards her. She waved to it and got the CAT running again, but it sputtered out completely before she had gone a few yards. So she sat waiting while the craft slowly wound its way back to her. Apparently it’s engine was no longer running so it was relying on the time-tested method of sails and wind.

It slowed as it approached and some argonians leaped over the side to swim to her.

“Khajiit?” said the first to emerge from under the water.

“Er… hello?”

“Bring her aboard!” called a man from high above them, and the argonian towed her towards the large ship, sending her around to scale a rope ladder up the side.  

Ropes were lowered and fastened around the CAT as other sailors drew it out of the water and onto the deck.

As she climbed over the railing, a phrase came to her when she saw the Captain of the ship standing nearby looking at her.

“Permission to come aboard, Sir!” she called out clearly.

The Captain nodded to her, and a smile broke over his face at the pleasantry. “Permission granted. You find yourself aboard the Hammerfell ship “Cutter”, khajiit. I am Captain Spenglor. Whom am I addressing?”

“I am Ra’Jirra, with His Mane’s Secret Service, Sir.  I must beg your pardon for being so inadequately dressed for such an occasion though.” she said, covering her lower region. “It’s been a long day.”

Chuckles were heard from around the deck, and she looked around at the crew. Primarily Hammerfell natives obviously, but they had their contingent of Argonians too – as had all large ships.

An officer wrapped his jacket around her which she gratefully accepted, though she couldn’t help but feel the breeze in lower places where breezes weren’t supposed to be felt.

“Please, then Ra’Jirra. Step into my quarters where we can talk. I have many questions, but I think we all gathered a fair idea of what went on out there. If I don’t miss my guess, you saved this ship.”

She had been walking with him, but at his words, she stopped and looked back out to sea for a moment. She saw the island, distant from here. Between them, there was nothing but open ocean.

“It’s my friend you should thank, Captain,” Ra’Jirra said loudly so that the crew could hear her. “She was an argonian sailor, like these in your crew. She worked for Cyrodiil, but she was a sailor, just the same. She died for you all, and for the crew she had lost.”

At this, her voice cracked. She hadn’t known Ropes long, but she wished she had.

“Her name was Wears-Only-Ropes, and you all owe her your very lives. Every goddamned one of you. So please, give her some respect.”

The argonians, as one, let out a cheer and the rest of the crew joined in, shouting “WEARS-ONLY-ROPES!” until it turned into a chant.

“Enough of this,” the Captain said, smiling. “They could go on for hours. Our flag may be Hammerfell, but sailors have a bond that goes beyond borders. Your friend won’t be forgotten.”

“So I’ve learned,” Ra’Jirra said, letting the tears flow freely and not giving a damn. Ropes would have been proud.

He patted Ra’Jirra on the back. “Let’s go inside,” and she followed him into his stateroom.

********************************

Ra’Jirra finished telling Captain Spenglor all she knew related to the underwater ship and the altmer plan to set Hammerfell and Cyrodiil at war.  During her tale, the Captain sat attentive, only interrupting to ask a few questions. When she had concluded, he sat back in his chair and looked at her for a minute.

“That’s quite a story, Ra’Jirra. Can you back it up with any proof?”

“Captain, every argonian in the area will tell you the same thing. I also have a couple other agents that were there, if you want to turn back and ask them.”

He shook his head. “Can’t do it. We suffered some pretty significant damage, and our engine is broken. We’ve got to head back to Hammerfell. Ra’Jirra, out here I am a representative of the Hammerfell government. That little boat alone will be of great interest to us, I’m sure you know.”

“I do. The loss of it’s secrets will be a blow to Elsweyr.”

“And by extension, to Cyrodiil of course.”

She shrugged. “Not my decision to make, what secrets we share with our allies. But for all intents and purposes, I am your prisoner. I have little right to make demands. I only ask that you treat me with the courtesy of any political prisoner from a foreign nation.”

“Hostile nation,” he added.

“I suppose, if you want to put it so. I have worked against your country in the past, it’s true. And should my country ask me to do so again…”

“I understand loyalty,” he said. “I personally witnessed everything you did out there, Ra’Jirra. Everything I saw corroborates your story. But I have to ask you one question. When the fog had cleared, why did you steer towards us instead of back to the island?”

“Honestly, because I didn’t have enough power to make it back to the island. You were my best hope.”

“And if we hadn’t turned back?”

“I’m told the craft will recharge in a day. I’d have spent a very uncomfortable night at sea, if not worse.”

The Captain pulled a map from a drawer and laid it out on the table. It was obviously a map of the known ocean, with many arcane symbols she only vaguely understood.

“Ra’Jirra, tomorrow morning we should be in this area…” he said, indicating a spot not far from Elsweyr’s coastline before continuing. “If you were to escape tomorrow morning – you and your little boat – do you think you could make it from here?”

Ra’Jirra smiled for the first time since she’d come aboard.

“If I could escape using my clever khajiit wit and sneaking ability that is well known throughout Hammerfell, I might just be able to make it to my homeland.”

“Tomorrow morning,” he said. “Say, about sunrise?”

“Yes,” she said. “I might try such a thing around sunrise.”

“Good. Your craft might be conveniently located alongside my ship, tied only by a rope.”

“That would be fortuitous for me indeed,” she said, rising.

The captain put the map away and pulled out a bottle and two glasses, and poured a respectable amount into each.

“Ra’Jirra, would you share a drink with me?”

“Certainly Captain. What shall we drink to?”

“First, to your friend – Wears-Only-Ropes.”

Ra’Jirra raised the glass along with the Captain and downed it. Both glasses hit the table simultaneously.

“Next – to you, Ra’Jirra. I saw you out there. You ran nearly as great a risk as your friend. Don’t gainsay me this. Without you, this ship would be at the bottom of the ocean with all hands I have little doubt.”

Ra’Jirra didn’t argue. They downed the drink together. Already Ra’Jirra was feeling a bit light-headed, but she wasn’t worried. Whatever her fate here, she trusted this man’s honor.

“And last?” Ra’Jirra asked as the Captain refilled them once more as tradition dictated.

“Why don’t you make this one?” he suggested.

Ra’Jirra thought of what the altmer had shown her. She had not told anyone about that. She wasn’t sure if she ever would.

“To the future. A future where the races can live together. As peaceably as may be at least.”

“That’s a toast any sailor can drink to, khajiit. On the land, there is distrust – if not outright hate – between the races. But out here on the ocean, when it’s only you and your crewmates to depend on, races don’t really matter so much. Each race has its own merits and abilities. No matter how different, no matter how odd, we know that it is what lies within that matters most. To the future!”

The glasses hit the tabletop and the Captain put them away, then stepped to a wardrobe and removed a female officer’s outfit.

“We keep a few on reserve. I think this may fit you, save for the tail.”

“Why, that’s very kind of you! If you’ll excuse me,”

She removed the jacket and the tattered remains of her bikini top, and stepped into the clean, starched uniform, taking just a moment to alter it for a tail hole without tearing it too badly.

“Okay, you can turn back around now,” she said when she’d got it buttoned up. “How do I look?”

“A dashing figure of an Hammerfell officer if ever I saw one.  Save for the tail and the ears anyway. I’m guessing you’re not interested in the cap.”

She laughed. “No, I think not. May I assume I’m free to roam the ship?”

“You are. And you’re welcome to retire here to my quarters if you wish. I’ll stay with the first mate tonight.”

“You honor me yet again. But there is no need. I’d really like to stay with your crew tonight if that’s alright with you.”

The Captain nodded and stepped to the door, opening it for her.

She stepped out to another cheer from the crew. She spent the night with them, and was pleased to find that the argonians and the native Hammerfell humans were not segregated. She stayed up late into the night, exchanging ribald stories with the sailors and drinking a bit more than she probably should, considering she had an escape to execute in the morning.  In point of fact, the Captain himself roused her to remind her at daybreak.

You Only Live 18 Times #16

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Ra’Jirra and Wears-Only-Ropes raced towards the oncoming water-arrow at breakneck speed. Wears-Only-Ropes did a quick mental guess and set the timer for 5 seconds. Meanwhile Ra’Jirra struggled to keep the craft on-course against the waves that kept crashing into them. Then she felt the tap at her shoulder and pulled the lever, turning out of the path of the arrow a split second later but continuing at full speed away. The arrow passed directly beneath them in a flash. She didn’t turn around, but heard the explosion go off behind her.

She held tight to the controls and felt the CAT go airborne, but she hung on and she felt the strong hands of Wears-Only-Ropes manage to keep wrapped around her as they hit the waves hard upon their return. Only then did she slow and turn back.

“Good job, Ropes,” she said, breathing hard. “But we’ve only one more mine, and we can’t waste it on another arrow.”

“I know, Raj.  And I know what I have to do. You don’t need to tell me. If I hold the timer, will it stop, or does launching the mine start the timer where it’s set?”

“I don’t know, Ropes. I really don’t.”

“Well, we’ve not much choice, I guess. I’ll set it for 60 seconds, you launch it, then I’ll dive in after it. But damned if I know where that goddamn ship is. It’s dark under there Raj. I may not find it at all.”

Ra’Jirra looked back towards where the two water-arrows had come from and headed back that way.

“Why haven’t they launched another one already?”

“When I was in the ship, there were two big tubes. My guess is it takes them a while to reset for another shot. I’ve no idea how long, but Ropes, there are lots of arrows inside there.”

The argonian nodded.

“When I’m off, you get the hell out of here. If this works, there’s going to be an explosion like nothing any of us have ever seen, Raj.”

Ra’Jirra slowed the CAT to a halt, guesstimating she was roughly over where the Dominion might be. Then she hugged Wears-Only-Ropes.

“If I…” she started, but the argonian just hugged her back then drew her away by the shoulders.

“You couldn’t get close, Ra’Jirra. No, this is what I’m here for. I knew it when I followed you.”

“I’ll tell them about you, Ropes. You won’t be forgotten.”

Argonian’s didn’t exactly cry, but Ra’Jirra saw the nictitating membranes flashing.

“Do that, Ra’Jirra. And tell them about my crew. I was just one of them. They all would have done this.”

Ra’Jirra hugged her once more. “You are their avenging angel, Ropes. Good luck!”

Wears-Only-Ropes pulled away from her again and pulled the last mine out, setting the timer for the 60 second maximum, then put it back on the rack.

“Wait!” Ra’Jirra said when she turned back around.  “Do you see that?”

Wears-Only-Ropes followed where she was pointing. Some hundreds of yards away, something glinted with the distinctive color of Dwemer metal.

They looked at each other.

“That’s it,” Wears-Only-Ropes declared. “The Dominion must be under there.”

“Hold on!” Ra’Jirra said, and spun the craft to face the shining object sitting stationary above the waves.

“Don’t forget what I said, Raj. You get the hell away!” Wears-Only-Ropes called over her shoulder.

“I will, Ropes.  You go take care of that thing.”

A minute later and Ra’Jirra shouted back. “Ready?”

“Ready!”

Ra’Jirra slowed to a stop and pulled the lever. She heard the mine splash behind her, now armed. Wears-Only-Ropes followed it. She saw the argonian grab the mine and begin swimming deep.  Then she hit the throttle and began flying away from the spot, aiming roughly for where the Hammerfell ship was sailing away at full speed.

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Underwater, Wears-Only-Ropes saw the thin tube of Dwemer metal going straight down into the depths. It would take her more than a minute to reach the Dominion, and she sincerely hoped the timer wasn’t running as she held the dial at the 1 minute mark. If it was running internally, she’d never know it. She would be blown to bits when it went off. She could only trust in luck there.

As she continued downwards, she slowly saw the huge shape of the Dominion looming out of the depths below. It could be nothing else. She stuffed the mine into her pants and redoubled her efforts, fighting against her natural buoyancy. She was just getting close when she saw another figure coming around from the bottom of the ship. It was another argonian, and she recognized him as the big guard. In his mouth, he held a wicked looking knife and he was coming fast.

But she couldn’t simply swim away. She might well be faster through the water than him, but the Dominion might well get under way at any moment. Instead, she turned to face him.

Fighting underwater, even for argonians, was a hard business.  All movements were terribly slow compared to in the open air. But she was both a sailor and an argonian. It wasn’t her first time. She avoided his attempts to cut her with the knife, but soon it was clear she was getting nowhere, and time was not her friend here.

Then he closed on her, wrapping an arm around her neck. She saw the hand with the knife descend and grabbed it, turning it towards her mouth where she bit the arm, hard. Very hard. She felt bones crunch between her teeth and she wrenched at it with the strength of an alligator, rolling in the deep.

She heard another noise then. Not the screaming of her assailant, though that reached her clearly enough. No, this was coming from the Dominion. She kicked the maimed argonian away from her and saw the hand, severed now, fall into the depths below along with the knife. Then she turned back to the ship. She saw a port sliding slowly open in the nose of the thing, and recognized that it must be the aperture of one of the arrow-tubes. They were going to launch another any moment.

Suddenly she had an inspiration. She might not have the time, but it was the best chance she had. Rapidly she untied the ropes around her chest and swam up to catch the argonian who was trying to escape to the surface.  She wrapped the rope around him rapidly, and trussed him tightly, hauling him back to the Dominion all the while.  

The arrow hadn’t launched yet. She manhandled the argonian, forcing him into the tube and rapidly tying the ropes around the portal’s edge, trapping him within. Then she pulled the mine out of her pants and checked the timer. It had only a few seconds left, so she cranked it back to 60 seconds, then thrust it deep down into the argonian’s own pants, knowing he was tied far too well to get it out in time.

“Goodbye, Pak-Sha,” she said, waving before she swam away as fast as she could, upwards and back away from the nose of the ship.  She knew any hope of survival was pointless at this range, but she couldn’t help but hope. Still, she felt okay. She’d done her job. In a few seconds it would be over anyway, and she wanted to at least be sure the bulk of the Dominion was between her and the mine when it went off.

In fact, the mine alone would still not have breached the hull of the Dominion, even if placed directly on it. But the torpedo tube was a weak point when it’s hatch was open as it was now. Even then, the Dominion may have survived had it not been for the armed torpedo that was awaiting launch inside it.

But the combination made the outcome inevitable. The mine went off. In milliseconds, its explosion caused the destruction of the armed torpedo within the tube. In turn, the torpedo’s explosive power was well beyond the small mine. The nose of the Dominion expanded outwards under the incredible power of the torpedo. But even that was dwarfed when the other torpedoes held within the ship joined the explosion.  And all this happened within a single second. Not a single soul aboard the Dominion even had time to register alarm. Only Number 4 had any clue they were in any danger, and he was blind, unable to see what was happening just outside the ship. His periscope only viewed the surface above the water. His last seconds were spent watching the naked rear of that damned khajiit, speeding away at top speed, her tail waving in the wind. And then all within were snuffed out before a single nerve could register the explosion.

You Only Live 18 Times #15

Dar-Amon awoke to pandemonium. An alarm was sounding and he was rudely thrown from his place between Deej’s breasts as the two argonians rushed to get ready. Dar-Amon remained safely out of the way in a corner as they scurried to-and-fro. In less than two minutes, they were both out the door, leaving Dar-Amon to blink at the sudden silence.

He thought briefly about the night before. Already his subconscious was trying to make him forget the unimaginable horror that was argonian sex, and he shivered again involuntarily at the thought, but refused to remember what he’d seen. Whether she knew it or not, Deej’s gentle treatment of him afterwards had allowed him to return to sanity and the ability to tolerate close proximity to their race again.

“No good will come from thinking of that,” he said aloud at the silence. Outside he heard the sound of many other argonians rushing about. A few minutes later and he’d managed the basket trick again and was back on the ledge. By then, no argonians were in sight but he heard quite a lot of noise from somewhere by the beach. He had to get out, and quickly!

He worked another thread loose and tried to shove his head through.  It was close, but not quite. He worked at the next thread of he screen as fast as he could. Finally it broke and he SQUEEZED his head through, scrabbling with his claws on the window sill to get more grip. Another thread popped and he was through, falling unceremoniously to the ground outside. He shook his dignity back into place and loped towards where all the activity was – mostly near the dock but also farther out by the beach.

He’d never seen so many argonians in one place. An involuntary shiver ran through him. All those scaly bodies writhing over and around each other…

“NO! They’re just talking!” he shouted to himself, recovering from his imagination.

They seemed to be arguing with each other, but he saw that the Dominion had already set sail. Then he also noticed there wasn’t an altmer in sight. He nudged his way into the center of the crowd, and noticed Deej and Skalen were part of the outer crowd as well.

Inside an old argonian was talking loudly, answering others.

“No! They are not our friends. Listen, I don’t care how well they’ve treated you, they are killing other sailors with that ship!”

“But not argonians!” shouted another nearby.

“That’s what I’m trying to tell you. The other ships have many argonians on them! They may be from Hammerfell, but they’re manned by all races, and argonians are a majority of those!”

“And besides,” said a voice Dar-Amon recognized. “Since when do we kill other races anyway? That is not the way of the Hist!”

“Well, we’re not killing them. We’re just… letting them kill each other!”

“Not,” said the elder, “if we’re helping them with this ship. And besides, do we really want another race to take over this island? True, it’s not Argonia, but there are lots of small islands all round us. If the other races take over all those islands, they can easily attack us after they’ve built up their forces.”

That, Dar-Amon realized, was a good tactic. Self-defense of their homeland was a prime motivating factor for argonians. The murmuring in the crowd took on an ominous tone.

Geeus’ voice came back then. He obviously had already made the assumption that the crowd was now with him. “It is not enough that we run the almer off the island either. We must destroy this entire facility. Go back to your rooms and get your belongings and bring them back to the beach. Then we must destroy.”

“What do we do with the altmer? Most of them are on the ship, but there’s still some hiding in the buildings and around the island.”

“We are not killers, and they have magic. Let them know we are here only to destroy what they’ve built, not them. If they attack you though, call for help. They will fall to our numbers, magic or not. If we keep them from building on this island, they will leave on their own. We made a mistake in letting them take this island. We must fix that mistake.”

A cheer went up, and even Deej and Skalen joined in, he saw. Deej looked down and saw him. She picked him up. “Mekal! What are you doing here? You’re going to get stepped on!”

The argonians were splitting up, going back to gather their belongings.

“Well,” Deej said to Skalen. “It was good while it lasted.”

The male put his arm around his mate. “We’ll do alright Deej. We’ll find another place.”

She nodded, and looked at Skalen and kissed him, in the argonian manner. “Yes, we will.”

Suddenly someone came running up to them.  “Excuse me. Ma’am? Um… that’s my cat.”

Deej looked at the new argonian and Dar-Amon saw Geeus when she turned her body around.

“Awwww!” she cried. “Really?”

“Sorry Ma’am. Yes. I… really need him.”

The two argonians looked at each other sadly.

“Look,” Geeus began, “when you get back to the mainland, look me up. Name’s Geeus. I’ll get you another cat, okay?”

Skalen nodded. “We will. Thanks. They’re hard to find in Argonia.”

Geeus took Dar-Amon and retreated behind a building.

“What happened?” they both said at once, as soon as they were alone.

“Well,” Dar-Amon started, “Ra’Jirra got captured trying to sink the ship. I think she is a prisoner somewhere in that big building. I got caught by those two though and have been trying to get away ever since.”

Geeus shook his head. “She’s not a prisoner. We saw her on the CAT heading after the Dominion, along with an argonian. I think it was Wears-Only-Ropes but I can’t be sure. As for me, once I explained the situation to the elders, they gathered every able-bodied argonian around for miles. We swam all the way across and got here just as the Dominion was leaving. But I think we got here in time to keep most of the argonians out of the ship.”

“So, it’s manned only by the altmer?”

Geeus shrugged. “I don’t know really. We argonians are a very family-oriented lot though. When your mother is yelling at you to get out of the ship, we tend to do exactly that no matter what the altmer are threatening.”

“Are you serious? Their mothers?!”

“Well, some at least.”

“Good thing the altmer didn’t fight back.”

“They’re not that stupid. We would swarm the place and rend them limb-from-limb if they tried. They probably would have if we hadn’t outnumbered them.”

“You’ve done a good thing here, Geeus. You’ve definitely shut down this operation. But if Ra’Jirra and Wears-Only-Ropes don’t managed to protect that Hammerfell ship, a war between Cyrodiil and Hammerfell is still likely. Once a war starts, even if we can prove it was caused by the Aldmeri Dominion, it’s a hell of a thing to try and stop.”

Geeus nodded and they both looked out from behind the building. Already a stack of belongings from the argonians was growing, and one of the buildings was burning as the argonians began their destruction of the base. Others were dismantling the dock as they watched.  But out to sea, the Hammerfell ship had sailed out of sight beyond the cove to the right and the little CAT was nowhere to be seen.

“Come on Dar,” Geeus said, offering his hand to the Alfiq. “Lets get to the other side of the cove and see what’s happening out there.”

Dar’Amon jumped aboard the proffered hands and Geeus began running across the cove.

They’d just topped a ridge and spotted the Hammerfell ship under full sail and turning aside when a tremendous explosion was seen and the ground shook, knocking Geeus to the ground and sending Dar-Amon rolling across the sandy ground.  Dar-Amon looked up to see a tower of water far out to sea where the Hammerfell ship had been. The tower resolved into a sort of cloud on the surface of the ocean, blocking view of anything within.

Dar-Amon looked to Geeus, who looked back at him, a worried expression on his scaled face.

“Damn,” Dar-Amon said. “God DAMMIT.”

“I guess we should get back to Elsweyr as soon as we can,” Geeus said mournfully, the whole island now gone silent in the wake of the explosion. “It will take some time before Hammerfell learns of this. Maybe our story can help.”

Dar-Amon nodded, still staring out to sea. “I suppose so.”

Geeus picked up the little Alfiq and headed back towards the cove.

**********************

Inside the Dominion, Number 4 wasn’t worried. True, the altmer that now manned the ship were woefully incompetent at actually doing the work that the argonians had been trained for, but they had plenty of time. As he watched through the periscope, he had to give the spunky khajiit respect for having managed to stop two of his torpedoes. But he had plenty more and it was obvious that the mines she’d wielded were only the surface type, and she couldn’t have many aboard that little craft.

“How long before the tubes are flushed?” he called to the Captain.

“Dammit, I don’t know.  I’ll get down there and clear them myself if I have to! XO, what is the status of the tubes!?” he called down a voice-pipe.

“It’s slow, Skipper. We haven’t the muscles of the argonians. Pumping the water out is taking longer than expected. Another 15 minutes and we should be done.”

The Captain began to relay the update to Number 4, who shut him up.

“I heard the man, Captain,” he said impatiently.  Then he turned to his bodyguard. Pak-Sha had been the only argonian who hadn’t left the ship when their damn relatives came ashore.  He, at least, was completely loyal.

“Pak-Sha, get down there and help them with those pumps. Show them what real argonian muscle can do!”

The argonian nodded and began climbing down the ladder while Number 4 returned to his periscope. The Hammerfell ship was moving away, but that really made no difference. They could easily catch up once their weapons were functional again. Then he swung the periscope around to look for Ra’Jirra.  But she was no longer where he’d last seen her. He spun the periscope farther around and his eyes went wide. She was practically on top of the periscope and the argonian with her was doing something.

Suddenly he realized what he was seeing and screamed.  “PAK-SHA! STOP! NEW ORDERS!!!”

You Only Live 18 Times #14


“If I could risk kicking it,” Wears-Only-Ropes said to Ra’Jirra,”I’m sure it would give way.”

“Yeah, but I’m sure that guard would hear it.”

“Not much of a guard. Hell, he might not even be there for all we know.”

“True, but I’d rather not risk it. Maybe a thunderstorm will come up or something.”

“It is pretty common in the afternoons around here. Can we wait that long?”

“I don’t think so actually. My best guess is that the Hammerfell ship will be coming along before then. Hell, I don’t even know what time it is without any windows in here.”

Wears-Only-Ropes nodded. “Yeah, I think we need to…”

And then an alarm went off. It wasn’t the same sound as the klaxon that had gone off when Ra’Jirra had tripped a ward though. The two looked at each other, and Ra’Jirra nodded.

Wears-Only-Ropes waited till the siren was at its peak, then kicked. The plank they’d been working on bent outwards, but made no significant sound at all.

“Dammit, we could have done that an hour ago!” Wears-Only-Ropes complained, but Ra’Jirra was already poking her head through the space.  

“No one here, and the doors closed. Come on!” she said as she wriggled through.

Her bikini caught for a moment, doing yet more damage to the frayed garment, but she made it to the other side and helped Wears-Only-Ropes squeeze through. The door had no window, so they couldn’t see what was happening in the hallway outside, but they heard shouting and feet running past.  Ra’Jirra risked a peak through the outside windows. Argonians were running in the direction of the dock, though. She waited till they’d passed, then unlocked the latch and slid the window up as quietly as possible.

“Are you thinking what I am?” Ra’Jirra asked Wears-Only-Ropes.

“The Hammerfell ship has been spotted,” she said.

“I think so too,” Ra’Jirra nodded. “Okay. Go through the jungle and swim to Argonia as fast as you can. I don’t think I can stop the ship directly, but I’m going to see what I can do with the CAT. I might be able to drop a mine on it before it goes deep.”

“The CAT?”

“No time to explain. It’s a very fast little boat I moored on the other side of the cove. It has shallow water timed mines made to stop pursuers, but they don’t go deep. Come on, there’s no time for this.”

Wears-Only-Ropes put her hands on the khajiit’s shoulders and looked at her seriously.

“Ra’Jirra, I’m going with you.”

“Dammit, no! Even if I fail, you can still stop a goddamned war! I’m just an Elsweyr agent. Nobody would believe me!”

“We’re going to stop that ship before it kills more sailors, Ra’Jirra. You AND me.”

“Fuck it, I haven’t time to argue, Ropes. Damned if I know what good you can do, but let’s get the hell out of here.”

They climbed out of the window and peered around the wall of the building. All the action was at the ship. They sneaked back the other way and then raced through the jungle towards the CAT as fast as they could.

The alarm stopped as they crossed over the hill and descended towards the open sea where she hoped the CAT still waited.  It took her a few minutes to find her way back to the rock shelf, and she lost the bikini bottom totally when it scraped against the side, but she had no time to worry about that.

The CAT was still floating where she’d left it.

“Okay Ropes. Here’s how you can help. Under the seat is where the mines are. They are set to go off 15 seconds after I drop them, but there’s a dial on top where you can change that.  If we can get in front of the ship, make an estimate of how long the mine should wait before it goes off based on our speed and the speed of the ship and set the timer, then set it back into the rack and tap my shoulder and I’ll launch it.  We only have four, so we don’t have a lot to work with. Better to take a little time and get the estimate right first.  Got it?”

Wears-Only-Ropes took out one of the mines and examined it, then put it back on the rack under the seat. “Got it.”

Wears-Only-Ropes cut the rope holding the CAT to the rock, pocketing it. Ra’Jirra was going to ask why she did that, but she’d already fired up the engine and had no time.

“Hold on tight, Ropes!” she called. “This thing MOVES!”

She felt the argonian’s grip around her waist. Good. Nice and firm.

Then they were off and sailing across the waves, gaining speed rapidly. Once at full speed, the G-forces leveled out and she felt the argonian’s hands release her waist. She was doing something with the rope back there, but Ra’Jirra had no time to worry about it. She was looking towards the sea. On the horizon, she saw the Hammerfell ship.

Then they passed around the corner of the cove and saw the Dominion. It was already under way and she turned towards the open ocean to intersect it’s path. There were three Almer on a raised tower that hadn’t been there before, apparently piloting the ship. They were looking out to sea towards the Hammerfell ship and hadn’t spotted her yet. The Dominion was fast, but no where near what the CAT was doing.

Then Wears-Only-Ropes tapped her shoulder and she turned around.

“LOOK! IN THE COVE!”

Ra’Jirra shifted to look directly behind them. Hundreds of argonians were rising out of the ocean into the complex. Too many to have been Dominion employees. She smiled. She couldn’t be certain from this distance and with the motion of the CAT, but one of them looked an awful lot like Geeus.

But she had no time to worry about that. She was almost in the path of the Dominion. She turned back and saw that on her current course she would intersect very near the bow of the ship. She turned right slightly to end up farther in front of it.

Then she heard the crack of a rifle. She’d heard that before. She didn’t see where the bullet hit, nor how close it was to the CAT. It had obviously missed, but there would be more. Wears-Only-Ropes was unaware of the danger of course. Rifle and gun technology had a long way to go before it became mainstream.  Her own gun was in the storage compartment, but with the amount of motion of the CAT, she didn’t even bother.

“SET THE FIRST MINE!” she called as she turned the CAT farther right, now directly in the path of the ship.

“15 SECONDS LOOKS ABOUT RIGHT!”

“OKAY, HERE GOES!”

Ra’Jirra pulled the mine release lever, then hit the accelerator and turned sharply left out of the path and away from the Dominion.  She looked behind her. One of the Altmer was doing something with the rifle, so she began turning randomly as she sped away.

And then the mine went off, raising a tower of water from where it floated just a foot under the water. However, she saw the Dominion plow through the explosion without slowing. Then it veered towards it’s right, farther away from her.

The Altmer may have taken another shot, but if he did, it must have missed.  But now the Dominion was heading away from her, so she turned back to intercept it again.

She risked a glance towards the Hammerfell ship. With it’s own speed heading towards them, ad their speed heading towards it, it had already become much more than a dot on the horizon.

Wears-Only-Ropes yelled in her ear, “Look! The altmer are going inside!”

She nodded. Damn. The thing was going to submerge. She had to get to it before then!

She turned and headed at full speed again directly to where she estimated it would be by the time she got back to it. She saw it was slowly going under the water, but she’d gotten too far away from it. She wasn’t going to make it.

As she got back to it’s path, all but the tower was underwater and the tower was sinking fast. She slowed the CAT.

“We can still hit the tower!” Wears-Only-Ropes said, a mine in her hand.

She put her hand over the argonians’. “No, Ropes. It wouldn’t cause enough damage. Put it back. We’ve got to hit it on the nose so the explosives inside go up. Otherwise they’ll just take it back and repair it.”

“But, we can’t just let it go!!!”

Suddenly they heard a new sound. A ominous whirring coming from underwater. The Dominion was passing directly underneath them now, dark underneath the sea.

“What the hell is that?” Ra’Jirra said, looking at Wears-Only-Ropes.

The argonian’s eyes were wide.  “A sea-arrow! They’ve shot a sea-arrow at the Hammerfell ship already!”

Ra’Jirra turned back towards the other ship. It was still a good distance away, but there was an odd white line heading towards it at high speed.

“HOLD ON!” she screamed and pulled the throttle. Wears-Only-Ropes had managed to get one hand around her, just enough to stop inertia from tearing her off the CAT.

Then they were at full speed racing towards the speeding sea-arrow. It was fast, but the CAT was faster still. They were fairly flying from wave to wave and they passed directly over the sea-arrow. They could see it’s shape, barely underwater, but Ra’Jirra continued on aiming for the Hammerfell ship.

“LAUNCH THE MINE!” Wears-Only-Ropes called over her shoulder.

Ra’Jirra pulled the lever a second time. It could have been no more than three seconds afterwards that the mine exploded, and with it, the sea-arrow as Wears-Only-Ropes had dubbed it, but the explosive in the arrow was incredible. The CAT flew high through the air, but Ra’Jirra didn’t notice. She was flying in the opposite direction. She had no idea where Wears-Only-Ropes was.

She hit the water hard and came up gasping for air, looking around. She was not a bad swimmer, but now she was alone in an ocean that suddenly looked incredibly big. Yards away, she saw the CAT, still sputtering and amazingly upright.  She started swimming towards it when powerful hands grabbed her waist and she began to sail through the water like a fish.

She looked back and saw Wears-Only-Ropes underwater but swimming hard back to the CAT. She climbed up on it and the argonian climbed up behind her. However, her shirt was gone. In its place, Wears-Only-Ropes wore her namesake. The rope from the CAT was now fashioned into a bra of sorts, but it was a quite long length of rope and it curled around her breasts and chest with knots and crossbacks that couldn’t have been easy to fashion. The argonian was obviously skilled in creating such a “garment”, if that word even worked.

Ra’Jirra thought momentarily about how impressive Ropes would be to an S&M aficionado. “Nice,” she said.

“Better water-dynamics,” she explained hastily. “I can swim faster this way.”

“You know, between your pants and my bikini top, we make one fully dressed person.”

“And one not-so-much,” Wears-Only-Ropes laughed, but then her eyes focused on something beyond Ra’Jirra and she pointed back towards the island.

“ANOTHER ARROW!”

“Goddammit!” Ra’Jirra cried but was off again.

The Hammerfell ship was already getting damn close, though it was turning aside after having seen the explosion. The crew were probably getting some great views of her and Ropes too, but she had no time to worry about that. Another white line was speeding their way and the big Hammerfell ship didn’t look like it was going to get out of the way fast enough.